Three policemen working the night shift after Hurricane Irma were forced to post a follow-up that read, “Please do not call 9-1-1 and request this group respond to your ‘incident,'” after their handsome Facebook selfie caused commenters to lose their damn minds.
The Gainesville Police Department posted this photo of Officers Nordman, Hamill, and Rengering on Sept. 10, and in 48 hours, it garnered more than 100K shares and 67K f*cking hilarious, thirsty AF comments. Here are some of our favorites, and honestly, SAME.
- “. . . as if Florida wasn’t already wet enough.”
- “This pic is exactly why your grandmother always told you to wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident.”
- “So, looks like my next vacation will be spent in Gainesville rolling through stop signs and driving with a tail light out every evening until I’ve been pulled over by the entire night shift. It’s gonna get expensive, and my insurance premiums will go through the roof from all those tickets, but . . . *fans self with a stack of travel brochures and birth control pamphlets*”
- “So if I don’t remain silent, will something be held against me? Just want to be clear on the rights.”
- “‘Excuse me officer, I just robbed a store. I need to be cuffed and frisked immediately.’ – Every woman in Florida after seeing this post.”
- “I never seen breakfast, lunch, and dinner in the same pic before.”
- “Next post: ‘Gainesville Jail can no longer hold any more prisoners. Looking for neighboring facilities to house 224,454 female inmates brought in on repeat misdemeanors and self-citizen arrests. They refuse to pay bail or be released. Please respond if you can help.'”
- “I can’t believe how many women are objectifying these poor, fine, young, strong, handsome, brave, sexy, delicious, virile, ovulation-inducing, mouth-watering, beefy . . . I can’t remember where I was going with this . . .”
- “And just like that, my life of crime began.”
In fact, they got so out of hand, they had to post this “update” to the caption:
“1. We are dying with the comments. You’ve actually made our chief blush with some of them.
2. MRS. Nordman and MRS. Hamill have also enjoyed knowing how millions of women are going crazy over their husbands.
3. We can confirm that Officer Rengering (far right with the amazing hair) IS SINGLE.
4. On another note, Officer Rengering is being placed into Cougar Prey Protective Care, similar to the witness protection program for his safety.
5. Please do not call 9-1-1 and request this group respond to your ‘incident.’
6. There WILL be a calendar.
Thank you all for the hilarious comments . . . they have brightened our time up here. As for the calendar, we are going to try and do something fairly quickly and funds raised will go to Hurricane Irma recovery here in Florida.”
Image Source: Disney